Sex during pregnancy is often considered to be a taboo topic. Whether pregnant women are afraid of their partners finding them unattractive or they think sex will be too uncomfortable or hurt the baby, it can be difficult to get in the mood. Even further, in Sofia Jawed-Wessel’s TED Talk she discusses how society views pregnant women as “vessels of reproduction” that should prioritize their baby and not their own individual needs. Someone had to say it…and we’re glad she did.
Now, let’s get real. We’re here to say that sex during pregnancy is okay and can be empowering! Sex is how we all got here in the first place, likely how you got pregnant, and you should be proud of the beauty and power that your body holds. In fact, sex drive often increases in some pregnant women. Taking care of your sexual needs is self-care and no one can tell us otherwise!
I want to have sex while pregnant but I’m worried. What do I need to know?*
- Your baby is protected by strong uterus muscles, amniotic fluid, and a mucus plug that develops around the cervix.
- You may feel more comfortable in positions where you can control the depth and speed of penetration
- More comfortable positions may include you being on top, on your hands and knees, or side-by-side spooning
- Oral sex? Totally okay! Just communicate to your partner that they should NOT blow air into the vagina because it is unsafe and can cause an air embolism
- Anal sex is also safe but may be uncomfortable if you have pregnancy-related hemorrhoids. Avoid vaginal sex after anal sex to avoid transferring bacteria
If you are encountering any new sexual partners it is crucial that you protect yourself from STI’s by using condoms or dental dams to help prevent transmission. Getting an STI during pregnancy can be extremely dangerous for you and your baby.
*We recommend consulting your physician to determine if intercourse is safe for you during pregnancy.
Benefits of sex during pregnancy
- Better orgasms. Increased blood flow to the genitals can cause more frequent and powerful orgasms.
- Bonding between partners. Sexual activity during pregnancy could help bring you and your partner closer together
- A boost to the immune system. A 2004 study found that sex increases IgA which is an antibody that helps keep colds and other infections at bay.
- Increased happiness. Orgasms release endorphins that can help mother and baby feel happy and relaxed.
What if I don’t want to have sex during pregnancy?
That’s common too and there is nothing wrong with that! Your body is going through a lot of changes and you may feel too uncomfortable to have sex with your partner. If you’re not feeling good, aren’t in the mood, or are experiencing physical side effects from pregnancy, you shouldn’t feel pressured to have sex. There are other ways to bond with your partner and help you both feel good physically and emotionally. You’re growing a whole human inside of you and your partner should be understanding and gentle with you. Communication goes a long way!
Jawed-Wessel said it best, “We have got to stop telling women what they can and cannot do with their bodies.” And that’s the thing, we’re not here to tell you what to do one way or the other. We’re here to educate and empower women to be comfortable in their sexuality. Listen to your heart, body, and mind! You know yourself better than anyone else. And if you want to have sex with your partner while you’re pregnant, or you don’t, we support you!